Sporting Rants and Raves: March 13, 2010

Hello sports fans. And non-sports fans. Which I think covers all people in the world. Unless you consider some kind of scale along which a person can like sports in which case there may be quasi-sports fans and die-hard sports fans and somewhat-sports fans.

It has been a while since I've posted a Sporting Rants & Raves. And I'm sure you're looking for the Happy Birthday. It's coming. I want to warn you, first, that I haven't been watching sports recently. Because of a few things happening in my life and more importantly because football and baseball aren't being actively played, I've not been much in tune. I cannot, therefore, promise to say anything particularly intelligent or earth-shattering in this post, not that I do as much in any other post I post. So, without further adieu, I give you a more absurd rants and raves.

Happy 46th birthday to Mr. Will Clark. No, not that Will Clark of Lewis and Clark fame. Or Will Clark the porn actor (yes, really). Or Will Clark the Canadian skier. I'm talking about Will Clark the guy who good but not great on the San Francisco Giants and Texas Rangers. (For which other two teams did he play?) Hey, at least he's in the Mississippi Sports Hall of Fame.

We're in March, so that means madness. Above and beyond the normal madness that seems to afflict everyone during every other month of the year. But to be fair, we haven't started the actual madness, as it were. In other words, random people aren't approaching me to enter their 'pools' to win money that I don't think anyone ever actually wins. Unless you're a person who doesn't actually follow basketball at all and who therefore chooses the teams based on their school colors and/or mascot. Well, maybe I have a shot. Then again, I know that UCONN has sucked, so probably not.

Upstart Minnesota mauling number 6 Purdue: If I were a Boilermaker, I'd be embarrassed about a mauling at the hands of not just gophers but golden gophers.

Singler, Scheyer rally number 4 Duke into ACC Final: There was a time when I sincerely disliked Duke. And in this sense, times haven't changed much. And yet, they're still always good. Blast them.

Tomlinson heads home unsigned after Jets visit: Many people are having a hard time finding work. But I think the person I'd least like to be is an NFL running back over 30 years of age. So, not really. He'll still get paid more than I somewhere. But I don't envy his position...

The Boss plans to attend opening day: Good for him. He's starting to remind me of the potentially deceased dictator of North Korea.

Kentucky rolls, will play for first SEC title since 04: This is one of those headlines - along with my past knowledge of Kentucky basketball - that will influence me to choose KY to go deep in the bracket. It's also one of those headlines that screws me out of whatever winnings there might be when the bracket has been decided.

Houston stuns UTEP, wins first NCAA bid since 92: I've always thought UTEP sounded like some kind of pharoah's son. Utep, the son of Amenhotep, lifted the scarab from the ground.

Vermont captures NCAA berth: I once had a conversation with someone in the Pacific Northwest about the state from which I came. I told him I was originally from Connecticut. He asked if that was a city up near Vermont. Now, first, really? Second, how is it that he could describe Connecticut as a city 'up near' Vermont? As if it were somewhere in Canada or something.

Roethlisberger's lawyer hires private investigator: I read an editorial recently that claimed that Big Ben is already guilty. Not necessarily of sexual assault. But of bad judgment. I couldn't agree more. I wish the commish could just tell some of these players to grow the hell up.

WVU, Georgetown play for Big East title: Notice no UCONN. Terrible. Notice also no Syracuse. Woo hoo. There is balance in the world.

Redskins sign Larry Johnson for 3 years: Speaking of growing the hell up, we get this story. But there's one catch that makes me pause. Mike Shanahan ain't gonna put up with crap. Not to mention that Denver - when Mike was there - was a running back heaven. There may be something here. Which isn't great for the Jints.

And with that, I end this week's edition. Until next I write, happy sporting...